Well, Colbert has been at it again. Knox College thought it would be a good idea to have him come and give the Commencement Address this year, and man that guy is on fire. It’s not quite as barbed as his last public speech, but it is very very funny.

A little taste that had my coffee inhalated deep into my lungs where it is still sloshing now:

My mother had 11 children: Jimmy, Eddie, Mary, Billy, Morgan, Tommy, Jay, Lou, Paul, Peter, Stephen. You may applaud my mother’s womb. Thank you, I’ll let her know. She could never protect us the way you all have been protected. She couldn’t fit 11 car seats. She would just open the back of her Town & Country—stack us like cord wood: four this way, four that way. And she put crushed glass in the empty spaces to keep it steady. Then she would roll up all the windows in the winter time and light up a cigarette. When I die I will not need to be embalmed, because as a child my mother hickory-smoked me.

I mean even these ceremonies are too safe. I mean this mortarboard…look, it’s padded. It’s padded everywhere. When I graduated from college, we had the edges sharpened. When we threw ours up in the air, we knew some of us weren’t coming home.

Oh man, I love this guy. In the same vein, as this came to light an older speech from Jon Stewart surfaced and it’s also a very good read. Man these guys are funny, I’m very jealous.

Anyway, there you go. It made me laugh.