Category Archives: Word of the day

Bedgasm

This word probably needs no explanation, but I still like it.  Especially today, when I am a little sleep deprived…

Bedgasm:

A feeling of complete and utter euphoria which peaks when climbing into bed at the end of an 18-hour workday, a long road trip or hours of extremely strenuous physical activity. Under perfect conditions, the physical release has been likened to that of an intense sexual experience.

It was a three hour drive in the middle of the night, I could barely stay awake. When I got home, I climbed under the covers and had a ten-minute bedgasm.

Thank you, Urban Dictionary.

Security Theatre

I recently started categorizing some posts as “security theatre” which is a great term that describes perfectly what the TSA is doing in the US with the airport security screening, no-fly lists, no shoes, no liquids, etc.  It’s described as

“..intended to provide the feeling of improved security while doing little or nothing to actually improve security.”

It helps quite a bit that the term was coined by Bruce Schneier, who happens to feature prominently in this article.  It’s a rather frustrating, but funny piece on airport security and the futility of the current screening and checkpoint process.  The war continues on liquids, shoes, nail clippers and worst of all, water bottles.   I find this sort of thing incredibly silly and considering the amount of money being wasted on it in the recent economic climate, rather irresponsible.  Still the author of the article has great fun poking huge holes in the whole screening process.

“On another occasion, at LaGuardia, in New York, the transportation-security officer in charge of my secondary screening emptied my carry-on bag of nearly everything it contained, including a yellow, three-foot-by-four-foot Hezbollah flag, purchased at a Hezbollah gift shop in south Lebanon. The flag features, as its charming main image, an upraised fist clutching an AK-47 automatic rifle. Atop the rifle is a line of Arabic writing that reads THEN SURELY THE PARTY OF GOD ARE THEY WHO WILL BE TRIUMPHANT. The officer took the flag and spread it out on the inspection table. She finished her inspection, gave me back my flag, and told me I could go. I said, “That’s a Hezbollah flag.” She said, “Uh-huh.” Not “Uh-huh, I’ve been trained to recognize the symbols of anti-American terror groups, but after careful inspection of your physical person, your behavior, and your last name, I’ve come to the conclusion that you are not a Bekaa Valley–trained threat to the United States commercial aviation system,” but “Uh-huh, I’m going on break, why are you talking to me?”

Or even better:

“…I decided to make myself as nervous as possible. I would try to pass through security with no ID, a fake boarding pass, and an Osama bin Laden T-shirt under my coat. I splashed water on my face to mimic sweat, put on a coat (it was a summer day), hid my driver’s license, and approached security with a bogus boarding pass that Schnei er had made for me. I told the document checker at security that I had lost my identification but was hoping I would still be able to make my flight. He said I’d have to speak to a supervisor. The supervisor arrived; he looked smart, unfortunately. I was starting to get genuinely nervous, which I hoped would generate incriminating micro-expressions. “I can’t find my driver’s license,” I said. I showed him my fake boarding pass. “I need to get to Washington quickly,” I added. He asked me if I had any other identification. I showed him a credit card with my name on it, a library card, and a health-insurance card. “Nothing else?” he asked.

“No,” I said.

“You should really travel with a second picture ID, you know.”

“Yes, sir,” I said.

“All right, you can go,” he said, pointing me to the X-ray line. “But let this be a lesson for you.”

 

I encourage you to go and read the whole thing, it will make you shake your head in wonder at the level of sheer stupidity behind this sort of pointless busywork designed to make us think they are actually doing something about our safety.