{"id":1121,"date":"2008-05-22T16:10:08","date_gmt":"2008-05-22T20:10:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/?p=1121"},"modified":"2008-05-22T16:10:08","modified_gmt":"2008-05-22T20:10:08","slug":"rampant-gun-tards","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2008\/05\/22\/rampant-gun-tards\/","title":{"rendered":"Rampant Gun-tards"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Almost shooting yourself in the foot (in the foot!) with a Glock while <a href=\"http:\/\/cnews.canoe.ca\/CNEWS\/WeirdNews\/2008\/05\/20\/5617061-ap.html\" target=\"_blank\">teaching a firearms safety class<\/a> is not a good thing.\u00c2\u00a0 It&#8217;s hard to maintain credibility with the class, ya know?<\/p>\n<p>More on that note, here&#8217;s a very entertaining read.\u00c2\u00a0 It&#8217;s the collected postings of a person known as the Mall Ninja, helpfully annotated and explained.\u00c2\u00a0 Basically the result of way too many action movies and not reading nearly enough books, this guy fabricates an entire universe where he (along with his tactical squad) is the armed protector of a mall, and is the only thing standing between the huddled masses and evil.\u00c2\u00a0 Funny?\u00c2\u00a0 Yes.\u00c2\u00a0 Scary?\u00c2\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00c2\u00a0 Sad?\u00c2\u00a0 Unfortunately, yes.<\/p>\n<p>Behold:\u00c2\u00a0 <a href=\"http:\/\/lonelymachines.org\/mall-ninjas\/\" target=\"_blank\">The Shrine of the Mall Ninja<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Almost shooting yourself in the foot (in the foot!) with a Glock while teaching a firearms safety class is not a good thing.\u00c2\u00a0 It&#8217;s hard to maintain credibility with the class, ya know? More on that note, here&#8217;s a very &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2008\/05\/22\/rampant-gun-tards\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[4,6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1121","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-apocalypse-soon","category-stupidity"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piGNU-i5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1121","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1121"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1121\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1121"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1121"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1121"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}