{"id":1633,"date":"2009-04-16T22:03:42","date_gmt":"2009-04-17T02:03:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/?p=1633"},"modified":"2009-04-16T22:07:57","modified_gmt":"2009-04-17T02:07:57","slug":"ah-darwin-table-for-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2009\/04\/16\/ah-darwin-table-for-two\/","title":{"rendered":"Ah, Darwin?  Table for two."},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"1632\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2009\/04\/16\/ah-darwin-table-for-two\/hairlessmkb0416\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/hairlessmkb0416.jpg\" data-orig-size=\"500,333\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Hairless Chimp\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/hairlessmkb0416.jpg\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-1632\" title=\"Hairless Chimp\" src=\"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/hairlessmkb0416.jpg\" alt=\"Hairless Chimp\" width=\"400\" height=\"266\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/hairlessmkb0416.jpg 500w, https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/04\/hairlessmkb0416-300x199.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/>Sweet gentle Jesus.<\/p>\n<p>Some thoughts:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Pay no mind to this simian&#8217;s lack of underwear, that is probably the least disturbing thing about the picture, and that fact alone will wreck you for at least 3 hours.<\/li>\n<li>This chimpanzee has no hair.<\/li>\n<li>He seems lost in thought.\u00c2\u00a0 Probably wondering if he should wear a belt.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s a chimpanzee.\u00c2\u00a0 WTF?<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s not an ad for a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2006\/05\/08\/updated-bodygrooming-marketing\/\" target=\"_blank\">razor<\/a>, (I don&#8217;t think).<\/li>\n<li>As a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/richu\/3196188065\/\" target=\"_blank\">Flickr<\/a> commenter noted, he could use some moisturizer, his elbows look a little dry.<\/li>\n<li>Cover up his head, and it&#8217;s your creepy old Uncle whoever, or that guy in the locker room who just won&#8217;t wear a damn towel.<\/li>\n<li>Some random Boing Boing comments:\n<ul>\n<li>That picture is one application of clown makeup away from the perfect nightmare fuel.<\/li>\n<li>Anyone who doubts evolution needs to see this photo.<\/li>\n<li>Great, another ape with less body hair than me.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Saw it on the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.boingboing.net\/2009\/04\/16\/xeni-i-think-were-go.html\" target=\"_blank\">Boing<\/a>, had to share it immediately.\u00c2\u00a0 It&#8217;s the most amazing, strange, disturbing, memorable, thought provoking picture I have seen in a while.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sweet gentle Jesus. Some thoughts: Pay no mind to this simian&#8217;s lack of underwear, that is probably the least disturbing thing about the picture, and that fact alone will wreck you for at least 3 hours. This chimpanzee has no &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2009\/04\/16\/ah-darwin-table-for-two\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5],"tags":[108,109],"class_list":["post-1633","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news","tag-chimpanzee","tag-hair"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piGNU-ql","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1633","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1633"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1633\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1635,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1633\/revisions\/1635"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1633"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1633"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1633"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}