I was sifting through some old emails last night that I had archived and came upon this little gem that I sent out to a chosen few back when I was carrying Quinn. It made me laugh to remember exactly how in tune I was to what people said, did, and how they acted around me. Enjoy.
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Nicole Vallentyne wrote:
\nSo…
\nIt would seem that yesterday and today mark the dawn of a new phase in pregnancy, and quite frankly, my least favourite.\u00c2\u00a0 This new phase I will refer to as gigantism.\u00c2\u00a0 Let me give you a few examples of how I am aware I have hit this particular phase.<\/p>\n
Yesterday I am all set to leave the house and pick up Jordynn on the corner from the bus.\u00c2\u00a0 On my way I run into a neighbour that I haven’t seen in a few weeks.\u00c2\u00a0 Upon seeing me he says, “WHOA-HO!\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 When are you due?” To which I reply, “About 2 weeks.”\u00c2\u00a0 The conversation is ended with him wishing me luck.\u00c2\u00a0 Luck how I wonder?<\/p>\n
Not even five minutes pass when I see my other neighbour Louise, who says upon seeing me, “OH MY GOD NIKKI!YOUR STOMACH IS SOOO BIG!\u00c2\u00a0 You look like you’re going to explode.\u00c2\u00a0 That is a big baby.\u00c2\u00a0 Oh you poor dear.”<\/p>\n
Thanks a million!<\/p>\n
So then we have today to reinforce any doubt I may have had about entering this new phase.\u00c2\u00a0 Court and I go out for lunch, and I return from a restroom trip only to find many individuals unabashedly staring at me.\u00c2\u00a0 Not staring at me in that adoring way of saying,\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 “Oh, how wonderful.\u00c2\u00a0 She’s carrying a new life within.”\u00c2\u00a0 Oh no, it’s more like a gawking\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 “Good Heavens!”\u00c2\u00a0\u00c2\u00a0 kind of look.<\/p>\n
Again, thanks a million!<\/p>\n
To top it all off though, and this one really takes the friggin’ cake; I go into Bouclair today to pick up some material for a project I’m working on for Jordy’s room.\u00c2\u00a0 To make a long story short, I had some material put aside from another store I was at in order to get all that I needed.\u00c2\u00a0 As soon as I walk in, I quietly ask a lady at the cutting counter, “Excuse me, do you have a washroom?”<\/p>\n
To which she yells at another worker at the other end of the store, “CAN YOU TAKE HER TO THE BATHROOM, SHE NEEDS TO GO!”<\/p>\n
Great.\u00c2\u00a0 So this other girl sees me (somehow) and says, “Are you the lady here for the white eyelet?”<\/p>\n
I naively say, “Yes, how did you know?”<\/p>\n
She replies, “Fern called and said that you were pregnant and big, and that I couldn’t miss you.”<\/p>\n
All I could do was smile, and walk up to her and say, “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE WHO ABSENTMINDEDLY FLAP YOUR CAKEHOLES AT WOMEN IN THE GIGANTISM PHASE OF PREGNANCY?!?!?!?!!??”<\/p>\n
…Unfortunately, that is NOT the correct ending of the story, however it is fun to fantasize about.\u00c2\u00a0 All is correct except the last sentence where I actually responded, “Great.”<\/p>\n
I pity the poor bastard that says one more thing to me today about my gigantism condition.\u00c2\u00a0 I swear to God I’ll go hormonal.<\/p>\n
That is all.\u00c2\u00a0 Thanks for allowing me that little rant.
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I was sifting through some old emails last night that I had archived and came upon this little gem that I sent out to a chosen few back when I was carrying Quinn. It made me laugh to remember exactly … Continue reading