{"id":2368,"date":"2010-11-24T14:16:24","date_gmt":"2010-11-24T18:16:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/?p=2368"},"modified":"2010-11-24T14:16:24","modified_gmt":"2010-11-24T18:16:24","slug":"tourists-get-fine-count-blessings","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2010\/11\/24\/tourists-get-fine-count-blessings\/","title":{"rendered":"Tourists Get Fine, Count Blessings"},"content":{"rendered":"

It seems that rangers at the Banff National Park recently had to fine a group of German tourists<\/a> for bothering some of the wildlife.\u00c2\u00a0 It seems that they were chasing and yelling at a grizzly bear and her cubs.\u00c2\u00a0 Let’s process that for a minute.\u00c2\u00a0 A grizzly bear.\u00c2\u00a0 And her cubs.\u00c2\u00a0 Grizzly bears (who have one of the best latin names ever: Ursus arctos horribilis<\/a>), on average clock in around 500 pounds, standing 3 meters if (gulp) necessary.\u00c2\u00a0 They are usually considered by smart folks to be actually the nth degree of grumpy on Vallentyne’s Cuddly <-> Grumpy scale of wild animals, registering a solid 100, which is actually the highest value.<\/p>\n

For contrast’s sake for those of you not familiar with Vallentyne’s Cuddly <-> Grumpy (VC-G) continuum of wild animals, we have “shaved disillusioned lynx” at VC-G 87, “over-caffeinated porcupine” at around VC-G 75, “irritated house cat” at VC-G 64, “rabid squirrel” somewhere around VC-G 28, and “tranquilized baby bunnies” being at the start of the cuddly end at VC-G 0.<\/p>\n

What I’m trying to get across here is: grizzly bear moms with their cubs are essentially the most dangerous thing you can find in the bush in Canada.<\/p>\n

It is amazing that the park warden was able to actually fine the tourists, instead of needing a squeegee to gather their remains.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It seems that rangers at the Banff National Park recently had to fine a group of German tourists for bothering some of the wildlife.\u00c2\u00a0 It seems that they were chasing and yelling at a grizzly bear and her cubs.\u00c2\u00a0 Let’s … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5,6],"tags":[296],"class_list":["post-2368","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news","category-stupidity","tag-bear-food"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piGNU-Cc","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2368","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2368"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2368\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2369,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2368\/revisions\/2369"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2368"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2368"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2368"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}