{"id":3000,"date":"2013-01-24T08:00:04","date_gmt":"2013-01-24T12:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/?p=3000"},"modified":"2013-01-24T08:03:21","modified_gmt":"2013-01-24T12:03:21","slug":"what-we-really-need-is-a-1000ft-baguette","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2013\/01\/24\/what-we-really-need-is-a-1000ft-baguette\/","title":{"rendered":"What we really need is a 1000ft baguette"},"content":{"rendered":"

As I contemplate just how cold the van likely is right now, and just how unpleasant my walk to it will be later\u00c2\u00a0(given the record breaking cold snap<\/a> here at the moment), the thought of a roaring fire is enough to make me weep with happiness.\u00c2\u00a0 Maybe even\u00c2\u00a0a nice hot snack.\u00c2\u00a0 Fortunately Norway has our back on this one, since they recently had a truck load of cheese catch fire in a tunnel<\/a>.\u00c2\u00a0 Yep, 24 tons of goat’s milk\u00c2\u00a0cheese apparently burns with demonic urgency since it burned for FOUR DAYS before they were able to put it out.\u00c2\u00a0 It will see the tunnel closed for a few weeks to clean up, cause we all know how hard it is to scrape burnt cheese off of stuff.\u00c2\u00a0 I mean it’s not like they have a self-cleaning option on that tunnel, amirite?\u00c2\u00a0 Apparently efforts to douse the fire were hampered by the long lines of mellowed out Norwegian people waiting patiently with fondue forks and wine glasses\u00c2\u00a0in hand.<\/p>\n

Unrelated,\u00c2\u00a0Norwegian Tunnel Fondue is the name of my next band.<\/p>\n

There’s a joke in there somewhere about not getting cheese in your Norwegian tunnel in the first place, but I’m a gentleman and I won’t go there.\u00c2\u00a0 Not to Norway, I would totally go there, I mean the joke.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As I contemplate just how cold the van likely is right now, and just how unpleasant my walk to it will be later\u00c2\u00a0(given the record breaking cold snap here at the moment), the thought of a roaring fire is enough … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3000","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piGNU-Mo","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3000","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3000"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3000\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3008,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3000\/revisions\/3008"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3000"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3000"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3000"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}