{"id":845,"date":"2007-01-24T21:59:55","date_gmt":"2007-01-25T02:59:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2007\/01\/24\/underpants\/"},"modified":"2007-01-26T12:51:17","modified_gmt":"2007-01-26T17:51:17","slug":"underpants","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2007\/01\/24\/underpants\/","title":{"rendered":"Underpants"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t know why the word underpants seems funny to me at the moment, but there you go.<\/p>\n<p>To follow up on my post about our <a href=\"http:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2007\/01\/23\/fancy-pants-weekend\/\">Fancy Pants weekend<\/a>, I could think of no lamer segue than the barest of common threads: pants.  So without further ado, here are two underpant-related products that actually stretch the bounds of good taste, if you can believe that such a thing is possible on this blog.<\/p>\n<p>First off (from our <a href=\"http:\/\/www.robertwilsonphoto.com\">Good Friend Wilson<\/a>) we have<a href=\"http:\/\/www.thesun.co.uk\/article\/0,,2-2007030500,00.html\"> a &#8220;medical&#8221; product<\/a> targeted at people with IBS or other such intestinal troubles.  It&#8217;s basically airtight underpants with a charcoal filter built in, that claims to &#8220;<span class=\"norm12\">ensure the elimination of nasty odours&#8221;.  Now here&#8217;s a thought.  I&#8217;m certainly no expert on biochemistry and such, and while I also am a big fan of clean air for all, I&#8217;m wondering the long term side effects of wearing these things when they trap all of your worst stuff in essentially an airtight pocket around your genitals.  I&#8217;m thinking of stuff like crotch-rot, pubic hair bleaching, even sterility.  I have absolutely no science to back any of this up, but come on is it that hard to imagine? There&#8217;s a reason we get rid of that stuff, you know, and normally it&#8217;s gone with the wind.  Just something to be cautious about, but then again if you are actually considering buying these things, then maybe you are willing to take your chances?<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Then we have an even more distasteful product.  I will spare you the product image, it&#8217;s a &#8220;safe&#8221; that you hide money in.  Except the safe looks like a pair of <a href=\"http:\/\/www.boingboing.net\/2007\/01\/24\/skid_mark_underwear_.html\">skidmarked underwear<\/a>.  I guess you leave these things lying around on the floor or something and if someone breaks into your home, they won&#8217;t likely want to touch them.  I think they have that part well thought out, at least.  My only problem with it is the thought of putting my money in there to begin with.  That&#8217;s a little nasty.  I hate to imagine the crime levels in your neighbourhood if you have to consider this product as a way of keeping your money safe.  Anyway, there you go, more pants related news for you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t know why the word underpants seems funny to me at the moment, but there you go. To follow up on my post about our Fancy Pants weekend, I could think of no lamer segue than the barest of &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/2007\/01\/24\/underpants\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-845","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-stupidity"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/piGNU-dD","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/845","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=845"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/845\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=845"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=845"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.vallentyne.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=845"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}