I caught the first of a seven-day run of articles on terrorism on Slate, I highly recommend you read it too. It’s going to start off at the “don’t worry” level and scale right up to the “pants-sh@!$ing terror” level by the end. The article quotes Bruce Schneier, who I have mentioned here before as being an entirely sensible voice to listen to in this crazy world.
Stay tuned for the rest of the articles, I know I will be.
It’s hard to come up with a pun that hasn’t been overused here, so I won’t. In the event that a gun toting maniac decides to come and shoot up the church knitting club in Arkansas, finally the ladies can now throw down and spray some hot lead back. It’s now legal to carry a concealed weapon to church, so I guess the pastors and fathers of Arkansas had better look smart and not bore the congregation for sure now.
Thank heavens, it’s finally as Jesus had intended, I’m sure.
To be fair to Arkansas, it seems that they are not the first, in fact the article says there are 20 other states that allow churches to decide whether or not to allow concealed weapons.
Most of those states have “firearm blessing” services at the cloakrooms of the churches, allowing patrons to have their sidearms blessed while they themselves are attending church services.
Ok I made that last part up, but it doesn’t seem that far off now, does it?
Some days the slide into chaos seems more fun than others. This isn’t one of those days.
While the “Big” 3 dwindle and shrink dramatically before our very eyes, it’s kind of hard to ignore the contrast of Exxon Mobil reporting their largest profit ever. Ever.
That’s even after the price of oil tanking at the end of the year, falling 70% at times. It makes you wonder just what the hell is going on here, doesn’t it? Not that I want us to be buying more gas in any way, but that is one hell of a profit (profit, as in AFTER expenses) for a year. If the price of crude was so high (and it was) wouldn’t profit go down? Sure, you pass the cost of to your consumers, but this is still rather incredible don’t you think? These guys really know how to milk it, maybe someone should talk to them about that little global financial crisis thing.
Seems like there could be at least a little wiggle room in the price of a liter of gas, what do you think?
The Ford Motor Company gave a press conference today and insisted that despite losing almost $6 billion this quarter, it’s quite fine, thank you. In a Monty-Python Black Knight moment, Ford claimed that the loss was only a flesh wound, and that it was in fighting shape. While it hopped around on it’s one remaining leg, bloody stumps spurting, Ford said that it expects to lose a LOT less money next year, and to come back here and fight like a man. Clearly woozy from the loss of blood, Ford slurred that it would be ready to sell cars that no one can currently afford in the current recession, and that it would return to health any day now.
“There’s no need for that government-lended $9 billion line of credit, really. We don’t expect to need any government money, at all, unless things get, you know, really bad.” Ford said, all the while blood stained $100 bills fell from every pocket as it swayed back and forth unsteadily.
Still, Ford looked to be at least ambulatory, unlike Chrysler, who was passed out on the floor, and GM who had it’s head jammed into the dirt enthusiastically, mumbling something about “..electric cars? ready any day now!”.
The last post of the year would normally be some sort of top ten list, or perhaps some new year’s resolutions. Not here though. Here’s the past year of the blog, highlights and lowlights. Mostly it’s just the stuff that jumped out at me today scanning back through the year’s posts.
First off we have perfect hindsight. This one really smarts. Looking back at January I was excited about the new Apple TV and thought it was ready for prime time. Flash forward to just this past week and it seems that I am as stupid as can be.
I debated my increasing maturity because I realize I am now capable of listening to cover songs without instantly rejecting them out of hand based on some sort of naive sense of purity. I noted that the music industry continues to die without many other signs of life, in spite of some really excellent advice available for free.
Technology was still of great interest of course, as it always will be. The ever increasing use of social networks to keep in touch with people led to greater and more intricate knowledge of your network of friends, ambient awareness was the term coined. It’s continuing, and the Friendfeed sidebar is a good example of how that will grow even more. This year led to even more robots designed to assist humans live every day lives, which I noted would inevitably lead to the death of us all.
I spent quite a bit of effort trash talking Mexico and Winnipeg for their attempts to make their mark on the skating world, even thought I didn’t have to defend Ottawa all that much. We still win. Similarly, the LimerickDB is still the best place on the web for rhyming jokes, and we sampled a few of my favourites. Also, we were privy to the most private thoughts of a monster, disturbing stuff though it was. I had lots of fun with rubber truck nuts, not directly however. It doesn’t hurt that they are silly beyond belief in the first place, but then the legislation starts and things get really weird.
It seems that a series of gun-related events cause me to post about them far more often than I normally would. One gun post even actually resulted in a series of (gasp!) comments from actual other people. Most often it was just me complaining about them and the people who are clearly not wise enough to be holding them, especially in public.
Speaking of people not wise enough to protect anybody, how about those TSA airport screeners? It spawned a whole new category of posts that will no doubt continue to grow. Similarly I particularly enjoyed myself writing about a certain monkey-smuggler who succeeded and then failed in remarkable fashion. Also we saw a family who was too stupid to protect their dog from a hungry snake, although they had several days to do something about it.
The financial crisis and subsequent auto bailout wasn’t funny, but that didn’t stop me. It lasted a few days, but we aren’t done with it yet since there’s more to come. Finally the strangest news story to hit here must have been the multiple feet washing ashore in B.C. I stopped mentioning it, but the story continues to this day. Crazy.
Finally, some of the more personal posts that kept me amused over the year, I mentioned Nikki’s growing fresh laundry addiction, just one of the hazards of staying home to watch the kids. Similarly, I revealed how she is a heat vampire bent on freezing me solid. She also laughed heartily at me for this little escapade with the Stratus, where I learned to use the Force to drive the car.
So there you go, it’s the past year of the blog condensed for your convenience. Hope you had a good year, I think we did. All the best to you and yours, see you next year.
Tomorrow the three Detroit car companies get to come back to Congress and try to ask even more politely for $25 billion in order to keep the lights on in some way or another. Â While I had lots of fun the last time they came to town, they really need to get this right. Â The impact of even one of these companies failing outright is massive and (for me at least) unmeasurable. Â Whole towns will suffer if the local plant closes, as at least some surely will. Â These guys have to show some real willingness to change everything about their companies, or they will be laughed out of the room again.Â
I think that the right approach by the car companies will tip things even farther towards wise energy use, renewable technologies and a better environment. Â Cars and transportation are big energy consumers of course, but I think that the sheer visibility of cars and trucks on the road will help to change the day to day thinking of people for the better. Â
I think that later we will look back on events like this with a different perspective. Â Like maybe we will look back in awe and say wow, those guys were in a tight spot and they really made the right decision and look at how much better things are now. Â
Or you never know, they might take the frigging private jets again. Â Actually it seems that at least the Ford CEO learned his lesson, and will be driving to Washington this time. Â Probably in a huge honking special SUV that runs on baby seals and styrofoam.